This sign at a pizza restaurant… Come and try the worst pizza one guy on Trip Advisor ever had in his life.
I tried evening out my tan from the other day, it didn’t go so well.
Hmm, just as I suspected. You can’t afford to keep the dog…
Julius Caesar pencil holder
When your mom parks the car illegally then says “I’ll be back in 5 minutes”
North Koreans haven’t gone to war in 60 years, but look at all the medals their generals are wearing, we could defeat them with a magnet.
Bill Clinton hiding in the Bushes is the best thing live seen in a while: